From: W. Joseph Bolte *****@gmail.com
Subject: a terrible dream that affects us all
Date: December 3, 2005 5:46:19 PM GMT-03:00
To: Stephen Wolfram *****@wolfram.com
Dear Mr. Wolfram,
My sleep was recently disturbed by a dream in which your company, Wolfram Research, played a very prominent, curious, and ultimately disturbing role. I don’t know if this was a vision of the present or the future, or a sign that I use Mathematica way too much, but the danger seems so great that I am compelled to write you.In the dream, I was climbing a hill in Southeastern Iraq with a very good friend. The hill was desolately beautiful, and I remember that I could see the intricate patterns of the clouds more clearly than usual. There were some native Iraqis going in the same direction, and they looked exactly like the ones in the last issue of National Geographic that I read. At the top of the hill was the entrance to an enormous compound with a large sculpture of the Mathematica icon directly in front. According to my dream, Wolfram Research had set up a camp there to study some archaeological finds that displayed a knowledge of math that was far in advance of the level previously supposed for the time period that the ruins were dated. They were giving tours of the dig, so we went right in. Sure enough, in the first room was a wall of tiles that demonstrated the Fibonacci sequence! Amazing!
As we continued through the complex, I started to notice a large number of American tourists wandering around. Surely they couldn’t all be members of your research team; there were just too many of them. I also noticed that as we got further away from the entrance, the archaeological finds were illuminated more and more by tacky neon lights. If you have ever been to Las Vegas or Myrtle Beach, you will know exactly what I talking about. Something was very curious here. It soon became clear to me that the archaeological dig was merely a front for some kind of luxury resort that was using ancient Arabic ruins as attractions. My suspicion was confirmed when we came up a palace, again lit with neon lights, that strongly resembled the Taj Mahal.
With or without your knowledge, someone had been mis-appropriating Arabic cultural treasures, installing tacky lights in them, and using them as tourist attractions! I hope I don’t need to emphasize what a disaster it would be if word reached the general public about such an activity. The anger against any responsible parties would almost surely ignite a terrible wave of violence. I beg you, for the safety and prosperity of Wolfram Research, our nation and the world - if you have any plans to establish a base in Iraq, even a math-themed one, please cancel these plans right away.
Sincerely,
Joe Bolte
This whole situation is SO absurd. Your post strikes as serious for you only. What can we do but make jokes about it?